Part of the fun of “Blood Relatives” is how Segan plays around with established vampire mythology. Yes, vampires are undead; yes, they drink blood (of humans and sometimes animals, but animals don’t taste as good); and yes, they can be killed by sunlight. But Francis also loves to chug bottles of booze — something Count Dracula, with his aversion to spirits, would gag at. And, even though he’s technically dead, Francis can also sire a child. Years ago he rolled into a town and got a one-night stand pregnant. Now, that woman is dead, and Jane, her daughter, has arrived to reveal to Francis she’s his long-lost child. And because her dad is a vampire, she’s a half-vampire herself. She has a thirst for blood, has superhuman strength, and can sprout fangs. But she’s also technically alive, ages naturally, and can move about during the day without bursting into flames.
Because Jane has no one, she wants to stay with Francis. Francis, as you’d imagine, thinks this is a terrible idea. But father and daughter reluctantly hit the road together, and it’s not going to be an easy journey. Jane is consistently angry in that sulky teen sort of way, and that’s part of the film’s problems. While Moroles sells the angst of the character, she’s stuck with the type of smarmy, sardonic, rat-a-tat dialogue that never, ever sounds right coming out of the mouth of a kid. Kids don’t talk like this — screenwriters do. And as such, I had trouble getting used to Jane as a character. You could argue that her nature is all an act; she’s a hurt, lonely kid and she’s lashing out and trying to sound wiser beyond her years. But I don’t quite buy that, and I don’t buy her dialogue.
But I did buy the conflicts that arise between father and daughter, two characters who are both very alike and very different. And I bought into the way these two lonely people ultimately realize they need each other, because each other is all they’ve got. There’s something charming about the way Francis learns to change in order to raise his daughter. Even though he’s already an old man, he’s finally being forced to grow up, something that doesn’t come easy to anyone — even vampires. However, there are darker, somewhat unspoken things lurking in the background — the idea that eventually, Jane will get older and older while Francis stays the same. That’s bleak and disturbing — I was reminded of “Let the Right One In,” which had similar tragic vampire/human dynamics — but “Blood Relatives” plays them for laughs. But perhaps that’s just the reality of the situation — we find humor in the macabre all the time. We have to laugh, or else we’ll cry. “Blood Relatives” gets that, and that’s part of what makes the film so affable, even if it does trip over its own Dracula cape from time to time.
/Film Rating: 6 out of 10
